Monday, March 30, 2009

Food on the Road

We had a lovely time in Hawaii, it was really nice. Yes, we missed two "Red Eye" flights trying to get to Europe. We toyed with going in and out of Amsterdam to get there, but when we calculated the taxes in and out the trip suddenly cost $1,500 more. Yep, No. So an hour before we were ready to leave to go to Amsterdam our heads came down out of the clouds and we pulled the plug on an international trip. It just cost too much money, there was no "free" going on there.

So we sat at the kitchen table and said "so kids, what should we do?"

"Let's just go to Hawaii"

"OK"

So we pulled out the jeans and sweaters, stuffed our suitcases with swim suits and sandals and shorts, called for a rental car, shifted our free hotel points for a hotel on Waikiki beach, grabbed our Hawaii maps and we were ready to go.

We flew over first class--they hand you Mai Tai's when you get on the plane in first class. And there are no taxes, if the flight is open, it is free. Wahoo!

The last time we went to Hawaii it was two weeks after we decided not to get divorced, after we moved back into the same house, after all the mess. This was three years ago. And I was thin, not the thinnest ever, but pretty happy with how I looked.

This time, I was not as thin, but maybe it's the age, maybe it's the shift in perspective. This time I knew I was one of the moms on the beach. I was there with my sons who are nearly men; of course I'm a mom on the beach. And it was fine. Good even.

I enjoyed the sun, loved the snorkeling, held my face to the gentle breeze and just relaxed into this good body that takes me places, is strong and healthy, is a part of me. But it is not the measure of me.

And the food was fascinating. Our lovely luxury hotel (free with points) had a cook to order breakfast, with good options for the Asian tourists which usually hold true for vegetarians, too. We ate big, huge breakfasts--miso soup, rice, tofu, poached eggs, tons of fruit. They had cook-to-order omelets. It was free! Eat lots! Good.

And there was an afternoon Manager's reception with free cocktails and snacky food. A couple of days that's all we really ate. Being out of our normal routine let us eat when we were hungry, and even with all the activity we were not very hungry very often. Two mornings I woke up after having no dinner and I was only mildly hungry.

How often do I eat by the clock? Pretty often here in my real life! Good lessons. Good stuff.

Now, it's time to start taking these things I've learned and moving toward fitting into the clothes I want to fit into. I think I'm ready to do this without compulsion, or disordered eating. Taking care of myself with kindness and a gentle touch.

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